I checked this book out from the library earlier in the week. Interesting to see something that was focused beyond the initial diagnosis and deals with roadblocks and plateauing once you get beyond the initial diagnosis, release, and acceptance of ADD.
I appear to be somewhere in what she terms Journey Two: Crisis of Identity, focusing on yourself. I’m working on developing a more realistic and well-rounded self-view. It’s hard work to stop seeing yourself through a distorted lens of “oh, I’m messy, disorganized and that almost always leads me to failure.” My favorite self-distortion seems to be either minimizing the positive or discounting it entirely.
Page 75 #2 Wipe out: Self-distortion makes you believe that others cannot see the good in you or value any of your positive qualities as long as the difficulties of your AD/HD are detectable. Which of the following statements best describes how you feel when others see you blunders?
- If you have a good opinion of me, it is just because they don’t know what I’m really like.
- If they saw the mess I left behind, they wouldn’t have the same good opinion of me.
- If I let people get too close to me, I would be “found out” as the impostor I am.
- When AD/HD happens, it wipes out for me all sense of worth and accomplishment.
For me, the last one really struck home. I’ve always viewed myself as someone who should be accomplished, and somehow fool the world into thinking that I am. Mostly things like setting up a meeting incorrectly or forgetting something to send someone I’ve said I would. If it isn’t beyond someone’s expectations, it isn’t isn’t good. So, most of the time, I’ve just felt neutral about anything “good” I’ve done. This opinion is changing though.
